Oh my Christ. As usual I always reply to those 419-scam emails from my Nigerian friends offering $30million if I give them a hand. A bit of scam-baiting always livens up my day. However I got this email today.
Foolishly I replied
“Bishop - my seed is everywhere - i have many monies to send you. Please visit my website www.goatse.cx for my CV.” (ps don’t click on that link)
However I did this with my cianw account but with my work signature - which includes my phone number.
3 hours later I get a call. With international beeps before connection.
‘Hello?’
‘Hello - dis is the Bishop Cornelius here.’
WA? OH MY CHRIST - IT’S A FRICKING NIGERIAN VICAR.
‘Mr Cian - I must pray with you. Please put your hand on your head and join me’
It was emotional. After a bit of prayer he asks me when am sending the battle seed. Yes - back to the battle seed. WTF.
Anyway I am scared that I will become some kind of target now for African ministers who turn up on my doorstep with a big bag of okra and 8 wifes.




















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