Fidel Gastro’s

Green Giant.

Our intrepid political correspondant Mr Felix Myjizz has just returned from a investigative tour of Central Asia. He reports back on the state of the area’s women, wine and women.

Central Asian Ho Scorecard:

Kyrgyzstan - 5/10. Didn’t see many.
Uzbekistan - 2/10. Saw too many, and all dog-ugly.
Turkmenistan - 10/10. Oh my god. The fittest line up this side of hollywood.Your #1 ho hotspot.
Azerbaijan - 8/10. Some real stunners, but the average brought down by
the flea bags spotted in some of the dive bars. Maybe we should have stuck to the funky hotels instead.
Georgia - 7/10. No stunners, but a healthily attractive average.
Turkey - 8.5/10. No idea about hos, but there are plenty of stunners.
Middle East -8/10. Plenty of stunning young ladies, but it’s all looky and
no touchy (or they’ll cut your hands off), so very frustrating.
Lebanon - 10/10. Wow. More glamour than Milan. More leggy, athletic,
fit birds than the Scandinavian Olympics. Not easy to spot hos though, so you’ll
have to actually pull. I think I have to go back. Soon.

Thanks Felix. His next assignment to rate the lovely ladies of Greenland and Alaska. How hot are those Inuit chicks under all that seal skin? Stay tuned for a world hotty update.