Fidel Gastro’s

Let’s go and kick Saddam’s ass y’all.

My main problem with the war is that the big MOAB bomb hasn’t got a cooler name. It really should be called the BabyKiller or X7: WifeMaimer.

My second problem is that I’m getting too excited about what mad mad weapon Saddam has up his sleeves. He’s acting like the weedy kid in a school yard fight who keeps taunting the hardnut jock with cusses like

‘And your fat b*tch mother, she loves the way I pay her and then kick her ass, yeah, yeah and your hairy gay dad too’ etc etc

The jock then attempts to punch weedy kids lights out with his smarmy sidekick jeering him on. The weedy kid takes the punch, turns around wiping the blood from his lip, pulls out a can of Lynx Safari and a lighter and using this DIY flamethrower, puts the jock in hospital with 3rd degree facial burns.

I’m again half expecting Saddam, after the inital bombing raids, to call forth his army of disco robots which he’s been secretly developing and, using their laser firing eyes, pincher claws, and flashdance moves, destroy the feeble traditional weapons of the Infidel.

Once he has kicked Bush’s ass he can use his androids to rebuild his solid gold palaces and play exhibition pro-football against the Cowboys in Baghdad Stadium.